Thursday, April 15, 2010

#46 The Plan

When single girls say we like plans, we don't mean marital plans, career plans or baby-making plans.  Oh, God, no.  Who does that?  This is why we're still single.  When we say we like plans, we're talking about something a little more immediate.

Let's say a single girl has "plans" with a dude for Sunday evening.  She doesn't know if they're having dinner and drinks or just drinks, let alone what time they are meeting.  At around four o'clock in the afternoon when she hasn't heard from him all day, she takes it upon herself to ask him what time they will be seeing each other.  He texts back that he's on a hike and won't be ready for a few hours.  Three and a half hours later, she is STARVING, heats up a Lean Pocket and eats it over the sink.  Mid-bite she gets a call from the dude.  He seems disappointed that she's already having dinner (sorta) and won't be ready to see him for an hour or so. 

Two hours later, she shows up at his apartment well after ten o'clock.  The dude is a little surly that she's so "late" and suggests they go bowling.  She balks as she's in heels (and refuses to borrow bowling shoes especially without socks) and suggests they stay in.  Wink.  He clearly doesn't get the hint, hurt that she didn't like his idea and petutantly responds that he has cabin fever (despite being on a "hike" for three hours) and was merely offering an alternative to the usual drinks at a bar.

They ended up having drinks at a bar and neither of them got laid that night.

Guys, don't be that guy!  Single girls like plans because we want to avoid situations like this.  We're not trying to be annoying, nagging or clingy by asking you what The PLAN is.  Hell, The Plan doesn't necessarily have to be champagne and caviar aboard some hot air ballon.  

On the contrary, we're just happy knowing that there is an agenda: WHAT, WHERE and WHEN.

What are we doing?  Are we golfing?  Ocean kayaking?  Watching a movie?  This helps us determine what we will be wearing. 

Where are we going?  A fancy night club?  A hole in the wall?  The beach?  Nowhere?  This also helps us determine what we will be wearing.  Specifically, shoes.  Don't make us be that girl who unwittingly wears stilettos somewhere with cobblestone streets.

When are we going?  Afternoon?  Evening?  Guess what?  This ALSO helps us determine what we will be wearing.  And if we know in advance what time we're meeting (and I'm not talking about an exact Jack Bauer time like 6:57 PST, 7:00 PST is fine), we can manage our schedule so we're (hopefully) not running late and making him wait in the car for ten minutes.

Nothing irritates a single girl more than being mal-dressed.  Sure, it's always better to be overdressed than underdressed, but we like to avoid those awkwards moments spent in 4" Choos and a mini-dress at the local dive bar unless we're doing it intentionally.  (I have a tendency of purposefully overdressing but nobody likes getting sawdust in her Choos.)

Looking our best and having the appropriate amount of time to do so is very important to a single girl especially when we're trying to impress a guy.  Shaving, waxing, buffing, polishing and plucking is ridiculously time consuming.

And here's a single girl confession: chances are, if we like a dude well enough, we want to get laid just as much as he does.  So when there's a Plan, not only do we have an idea of what to wear, we also know what NOT to wear...

So guys: Help us, help you!!

13 comments:

  1. We also get hungry. As you mentioned above, why make us starve? You could have had a snack had you known a time line. That is not very considerate. To quote you: Don't be that guy. Well said, lady!

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  2. (furiously taking notes) Planning is good. My worst dates are the ones that I wing. Question: First date, do I tell the girl before hand what we're doing? Also, is ski ball ever an appropriate activity on a date before you've become "exclusive"?

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  3. So why don't you just make the plan yourself? Why is it the guy's sole responsibility?

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  4. Chooos? I'm disgusted.

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  5. God this is so true! And why are they always hiking or playing tennis before a date?! One time a guy took me
    on a surprise date to the zoo, which was great, except I was
    in heels and a tank top and freezing since I thought he'd take me
    to the movies! Oh the blisters!

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